I am just numb. Is it bad to want this?

I’m at a loss. I don’t know what to do anymore.

My boyfriend and I have never clicked with sex. For the first two and half years together he had a porn addiction. Then after that he said he lost the urge to have sex because he stopped watching porn. Recently he’s been trying to put more into sex.

When I used to send nudes he would reply “ok”. If I sent a sext saying I was horny he would just respond “why”. He never used to do foreplay, it’s just stick it in me and be done. Now he’ll try foreplay but his version is rubbing my clit for a minute and then sticking it in.

I asked to flirt, to sext, to do something. I tried to be ok with the fact that he doesn’t like that stuff but it’s so hard to just feel like he wants me for only sex. He doesn’t want to make it fun or tease each other or make it last. It’s just about getting off. Our sex never seems to go over ten minutes. I’m just at a lose. I’m sad because he gets his feelings hurt when I say that I want that stuff, he says he’s not good enough.

I’m to the point where I’m just sad and numb and realize that he’ll never flirt with me, sext me, or be romantic. I feel alone.