Grandparent not seeing my son

Okay this may be long, my boyfriends mum 🙄!

She left her son (my boyfriend) when he was a few months old to go and work abroad and left him with him dad who lives in a different city to her. His dad had full custody of him and he used to come down to where his mum lives for school holidays and then go back to his dad.

Anyway when he was in his 20’s he completely cut contact off with her. I obviously live in the same city as his mum and have known him since I was 14.

4 years ago we got back into contact and he moved back with his mum to be with me.

When we first had our son she was here all the time, always texting asking how he is, always round to see him, we was taking him there everything was great. Then around September we started trying to get the baby to stay with her for a few hours so she could look after him a few days when I was back in work. Anyway, it didn’t go well. So she said she’d pick him up one day and take him out in the pram to the park so they could have some time together outside and see how he would get on. That day never happened, she never messaged, she never rang, she never came round. So from September till after Christmas we didn’t hear from her or see her. She didn’t come and see him on his first Christmas. My opinion on this is I would never chase anyone to see my son.

So now all of a sudden she wants to be part of his life again and I’m not not allowing it. I’m simply saying I don’t like the fact she’s in and out his life. This has obviously caused problems between me and my boyfriend and I just want some advice.

I don’t think I’m being unreasonable but if I am I’d love for someone to tell me I am.