Confession 3

Thank you guys for all the love and support xx 😚

Sorry if this episode sounds kind of boring

HENRY

My heart basically leaps out of my chest when he moves in a little bit closer and I’m lost in him. My eyes are travelling all over him trying to capture every detail he has. I can’t get over how handsome he is. God I’m obsessed with him. Not like he could ever know that. His hair is falling over his eyes again which always drives me crazy. I’ve never felt more attracted to him. Just us. I stare at his lips, wondering how they would feel against mine. I then look into his warm blue eyes. He takes his lip ring through his teeth, which looks so sexy, I can’t deny. I start to lean in a little bit more. But then I see something change in his eyes.

“Um...I’m going to go for a shower,” Lincoln quickly says. He jumps up and quickly walks out of the bedroom to the shower in his connected bathroom. My hands fall over my face as he leaves. I’m dying of embarrassment. I can my face turn red and hot. God how could I be so stupid. He could tell. Damn it! He’s probably so freaked out. I need to make some sort of excuse. Or pretend like nothing happened. Yes! I’ll just do that. I take a deep breath. But I still feel so stupid. And what’s worse, is that I feel ashamed. Shit! I punch his mattress out of anger, which luckily doesn’t make any noise. I take another deep breath and I try to calm myself which works this time.

After a couple of hours Lincoln, his mother (Linda) and I all had dinner. Lincoln had seemed normal, but I had no idea what he was thinking about. Which was strange since I always could tell his thought. We had a normal conversation with each other with some laughs. But I can’t stop thinking about Lincoln’s reaction when I came closer. It was now 10 and Linda told us it was time to get some sleep. We were walking up the stairs to his bedroom and my legs were shaking. I was so nervous, was he going to bring up how I had basically tried to kiss him....damn I’m so fucking desperate to be with him. When we reached his room, he was surprisingly casual. Like I hadn’t done anything wrong. So I played along, great full of my luck that he doesn’t care. But...that did hurt...a lot. He didn’t feel anything at all. What was I even thinking? That he’d kiss me back, then tell me to wake up from my dream.

“You ok?” Lincoln asks. I look up at him. He looks slightly worried, once again he has his lip ring through his teeth. God.

“Oh yeah, I’m fine man,” I say with the biggest smile I can make. He smiles back at me (that smile) and starts to rummage through some clothing draws. After a few seconds he throws a pair of pajama pants towards me. I catch them. I stare at him confused, I also need a shirt don’t I? Lincoln realises my troubled expression.

“Oh sorry, I usually sleep shirtless. I wasn’t even thinking,” he says...wait. Blushing!? He’s blushing? He looks nervous. He starts to look for a shirt. But I thought I’d save him.

“Oh don’t worry it’s too hot anyway, I hate summer at night,” we both laugh. We smile at each other. I walk into the his bathroom to change because I’m too nervous to actually change in front of him. When I walk back out into his bedroom he’s turned off the light but has left a lamp on which displays a soft glow, making the view a whole lot more spectacular. I stand in the doorway amazed. He was standing there shirtless. He was so muscular it was insane! His strong arms, chest and stomach has got my jaw dropping to the floor. He’s wearing knee length shorts which looks so good on him. His skin looks so smooth. He effortlessly lifts his arm and runs his hands through his hair. He looks so fucking good right now. Jesus I have to pull it together. I casually walk into his bedroom and hop into his bed. His bed even smells like him. My heart is beating like crazy. I can’t believe this is even happening. I’m excited! Why am I so excited? He hops into the bed next to me, and the butterflies in my stomach instantly go crazy. The warmth of his body next to mine. His shoulder brushes mine for just a second, and it’s the nicest feeling in the world. I want more of it, but that’s just a wish I’ll never get. We are both laying sideways facing each other.

“Um I’m sorry Henry, but can I ask a question,” Lincoln asks looking into my eyes seriously. Shit he knows! I’m about to go crazy, but in the last second I restrain myself and act calm.

“Oh yeah? What?” I ask him nervously, scared of the question.

“What do you like about me?” Lincoln asks. I stare at him confused. That was not what I was expecting.

“What do you mean? Your absolutely fucking fantastic. Your an amazing guy! Seriously you mean so much to me, don’t you ever think that you’re not enough or worth it,” I say to him. I suddenly realised how forward I sounded. And I kick myself in my head. But he just gives me an adorable smile.

“You mean a lot to me too Henry,” he says to me. I can feel myself instantly blushing.

“Goodnight,” he says. He reaches over and turns the light off. He lays back down quite close to me. He falls asleep straight away. I smile at him. He’s so adorable. I lay down, and I lay my head on his shoulder, and for the first time in weeks. I fell asleep.

I’m sorry that this one was pre boring but something really good happens next episode xx.