Favoritisms

I swear my husbands family is favoriting their first grandchild, it’s obvious. She just turned 2 yes old and my son is 8mo old. I am in a few family group chats on messenger of family that lives far away and I looked at them and realized that my husbands mother only sends them pictures of the first grand baby and not both grand babies. This is breaking my heart. It’s all about the other (first) grand child. I don’t see one picture of my son sent to them. 😔 Not only that, but they always have her too. Every weekend they watch her to give the parents a break. For those of you who are going to ask- I do ask for help. My husband is never home, he travels a lot. For example, today I have a dr appointment at 3pm and I asked them if they can watch my son so I can go a few days ago. When I reminded the grandparents today, my husbands father said they will pick him up and take him to their house. I asked if they wanted to babysit for the rest of the day to spend time with him, or if they want me to pick him up right when I’m done. I got no answer back. My husbands father came to pick him up and says he has stuff to do and asked how long my dr appointment will take. So im guessing it’s a no that he can’t babysit any longer. This is totally fine, I understand, People are busy however this isn’t the first time. It’s definitely makes me feel a certain way. If they have all this time to watch the first grandchild, why can’t they help me? I’m actually alone all the time. I actually could use the help, could use a night out. Also- I have tried to talk to my husband about this many times and it ends up in huge fights like “don’t expect my parents to watch your child” he doesn’t see where I am coming from or how I can see it as they are favoriting one grand baby over the other. The picture thing is what gets me most. I send so many pictures, they take pictures when we are all together, but only sends pictures of the first grandchild? Idk.

Any one have any advice? My heart is just broken. I want my son to be loved the same, and I truly notice the difference. 😔