so i’m 20 and going into 21 very soon. i live with my mom and my brothers and we’re all muslim. she’s very strict with me about going out because she believes since i’m a girl rules need to be different for me. she worries that if i go out the same way my brothers do my dads gonna find out and get mad at her for letting me do that. (note that my dad lives with his new family and has two little kids to worry about and my parents are divorced) everytime i have plans with my friends and it’s very late i tell my mom beforehand so she doesn’t freak out and she tells me that i’m irresponsible and i’m still a kid and shouldn’t go out that late even tho.... i’m 20, i make my own money AND i’m going to school. and on top of that i’m also lending my mom money for bills and i recently had to dip into my savings to give her money... a lot of money. and i don’t mind bc that’s my mom and i know along the way she’ll pay me back but my point is that i don’t make enough to be giving her that much and she still has the nerve to tell me i’m a kid and can’t handle myself by going out so late like that and her excuse for me being a kid is that i still work retail but it’s like no big jobs are gonna hire a full time student who doesn’t have their bachelors and PLUS with the corona issue it’s even tougher trying to find a corporate job like that. and when i tell her all of this she goes back to the fact that i’m muslim and i have no business going out late and that it’s dangerous out there and just a bunch of things that just sound like excuses to me. she compares me to other girls in the muslim community who don’t go out late like me when in reality they do their parents just dont know about it. my boyfriend tells me that i honestly just need to do whatever i want and if she actually decides to snitch on my dad (which would be a bad situation bc he’s very religious and cultural AND he pays for my college and a bunch of our bills so he would flip out and would probably cut me or all of us off) then that just means i need to get out of this house. i don’t know what to do because i want to live my life and have fun but my parents always guilt trip me and make me feel like i’m doing too much and asking for too much when in reality i know i’m just asking to be treated like an adult :/

but don’t get me wrong aside from the curfew my parents aren’t TERRIBLE. i know that if i move out my parents and i would have a better relationship with them but tbh i dont have a good enough job to move out, where i live rent literally costs an arm and leg, i don’t know anybody who’s willing to move out with me anytime soon (all my friends have chill parents) and plus my dads gonna stop paying for my tuition if i move out :// at this point i just feel like i need to do whatever i want and if my mom has a problem with it then she’s gonna have to deal with it bc i feel like they’re not really giving me any other option. my brothers got to do whatever they want when they were my age. one because he dormed and the other because he just never listened to her when she told him to come home. and then there’s me who rushes home the second i’m out past 1 ugh lmaoooo