Words of encouragement please

I’m in Louisiana with my ol man because he’s working here right now, we have a two year old and I’m 25 weeks pregnant. My man just relapsed after like seven months and got high on meth. I don’t have a drivers license just my learners but I’ve already packed my van (it’s in MY name) and tomorrow I’m heading back home (6+ hours away) im crossing my fingers he’ll ride along so I don’t have to drive illegally or I’m leaving him here stranded to figure it out on his own and praying to God I make it home safe with my baby girl. I can’t keep dealing with this. I’m done, I deserve to be happy, my children deserve someone who won’t chose drugs over them. The worst part is I don’t have a job or a baby sitter in order to get a job. I’m a stay at home mom and my SO and I panned this second pregnancy.. and now I wish I wouldve known this was gonna happen so i could’ve just waited and not had to do the rest of this pregnancy and labor alone.. I’m goin to have to find a baby sitter ASAP and get a job even if it’s at McDonald’s so I can get my own place, get my license and get my life together...

To anyone who is dependent on a man.. don’t be. I don’t care how great your life is. Mine was just perfect, or so I thought. Go find something for yourself to make money, save it all. Have your own vehicle in your name. Have a back up plan. I’m totally at a loss for words and I’m trapped in a fucked up situation with kids. Pray for me. Tell me I can do this. Because I’m so heartbroken I’m numb.