I’ve come to the conclusion that I am in fact a toxic person. I’ve realized that if im not happy I tend to think that no one else should be either. I complain way to much and my insecurities get the best of me. I have a wonderful man who would go to the edge of the earth for me but yet I find reasons to complain. I’m just not happy with myself so it reflects in all that I do. I don’t feel like myself since I got sick back in April and that plays out day by day. I want to be a better person, a happy person. I want to let my immature and toxic ways go but I’m struggling to find enough self love to help me through. I constantly compare myself to my boyfriends ex girlfriend. I don’t even know her but my mind is so fucked I feel like I know her life story based on pictures she’s posted on social media. I wonder why he would ever want me. I’ve had so many health issues, my hair is falling out daily from the stress of my illness, i feel like my eyes are caving in & I’m gaining weight. I’m so selfish. I just want to feel better again, like myself. I want to heal and be a better person for me and every one around me.

Please no judgment but those who have felt this way how did you begin to love yourself?