Feeling disconnected

So basically I have been having a lot of thoughts about breaking up with my boyfriend. He is a great person, but sometimes I’m unsure if he’s *my* person.

We were so happy and everything was going great and then probably around July I began to feel stir crazy just due to covid, him being home 24/7, me being home a lot more due to hours getting cut at my job. We began bickering A LOT more plus I’m under stress from taking 18 credits at school.

Lately I have just been feeling resentful of his constant presence and even asked him to go and stay with his mom (she lives in another state, and he’s from there) for a few weeks so we can have some space and just take a breather from constantly being around each other. He is very against it and won’t even entertain the conversation. I can’t leave the apartment since I have such a full school schedule that’s all online, plus I work 20 hours a week! Going to stay with my mom is completely unrealistic because she has so many people staying with her already so I would be on the couch, and she lives about 45 minutes away from my job driving (I don’t have a car).

I’m getting so frustrated because I love him, but I don’t even want him touching me anymore. I wish he would just give me space! Like why am I a horrible person for asking for some space when he has been constantly breathing down my back and is completely dependent on me since March!! I literally cannot take it anymore.

I fear that if he doesn’t give me space, I will lose the love that I have for him and we won’t be able to repair what’s left. I’m always on the verge of tears and it makes it hard to focus on school because I feel such a great tension between us sometimes.

I want to go back to the old ya, but who knows when Covid will end and he solely works at home now (barely works) and he doesn’t care to ever go see his friends and the one time I go hangout with my friends, he completely acted like an ass and pestered me about if I cheated on him (never have). I’m so burnt out and I think I may have depression and I miss him and our old relationship but I also want him away from me!!! Please give some advice 😭