Should I feel like this?

So I was diagnosed about 2 years ago. I haven’t been dating really or anything because I’m scared shitless to disclose. So I finally tell 2 guys one that I’ve been knowing for about a year and a half and talked to on and off & the second guy I’ve known for about 6 months & has been chasing me lol sometimes i would talk and sometimes i wont. The first guy pretty much ghosted me, the second guy accepted it. So we talked about what we wanted and etc and we’re supposed to hang out today and spend a night with each other. Why am I nervous? Why am I scared to face sex? Why am I nervous about him only wanting sex? I haven’t had sex in about 3 years but before that I had a pretty active sex life. Now I’m thinking about coming up with an excuse not to see him. Why am I like this??