i faint... please help- anything will help me

hi! thank you for taking the time to read my post, really! im just posting because no one ever does reply to my posts but i dont blame them! its alot of problems:(

but ive been having this serious issue and ive never spoke out about it but i think i need help.. everytime i try to finger myself or put on a tampon i either faint or vomit:( it sucks because ive always wanted to please myself and not depend on my boyfriend all the time. what baffles me is that i can have sex! but not with myself. i cant do anything and its driving me insane now that im 18 and i want to live!!!

again thank you so much for reading through my post, im sorry to take up your time:( i hope youre all well during the pandemic!

in love and light,

Jas