Is anyone else apprehensive and dreading the newborn phase?

We’ve got such a good groove going with our 21 month old. She’s happy and thriving. She’s almost two, so she’s a tempest, but we don’t have any big problems with her.

This current pregnancy was very much planned and wanted. The baby is very much planned and wanted.

I just…hated the newborn phase the first time around. Now I’m dreading the disruption to our current routine. I’m dreading the sleep deprivation and loneliness of breastfeeding in the middle of the night. I’m not really into babies. “Baby” is just the required stage to get to the fun stuff (for me, anything after, like, 5 months).

I know it will be temporary, and maybe it will be easier this time knowing how fun it will be later. And I’m so looking forward to seeing this new addition with my daughter.

Just… ugh. Obviously i feel terrible for feeling this way, and he will be so loved, I’m just not looking forward to those first few months.