How do I get him to understand?

My husband and are having problems because he’s accusing me of “not loving him anymore” or “not wanting to be around him”. I’m just touched out and fucking exhausted. I feel like he’s just being completely insensitive. I was at the ER Monday night tell 3 am with our 1 year old who’s temperature was so high he was having febrile seizures. He has RSV and he’s okay, but still pretty sick. Its just been an exhausting few days for everyone. He would have been at the ER with my if he could have, but they still only allow one person. So while i was at the ER with a sick baby for hours doing the best as I could to make him comfortable and happy, my husband got to go home and sleep. Which is fine, he has to go to work. But I didn’t get in bed tell 5 am, got up at 8:30 and stayed home with the kids while taking care of our sick baby yesterday and today. I haven’t showered in 3 days, I could have yesterday while he was home but I was so tired I passed out until he had to go to bed for work. He works 12 hour shifts and I know he’s tired too. Didn’t get in bed tell 1 am last time because I was so stressed about the baby. And he just got home today and is upset because I won’t “spend time with him”. I told I’m sorry I’m just touched out, I’ve been dealing with two kids and a sick baby attached to me all day, I haven’t a second to myself, I haven’t even had time to brush my hair or change my clothes because all he wants to do is hold onto me. I just need a break. I don’t want to do anything but take a bath and a nap. But he just doesn’t get it and gets annoyed and said “do you just not want me to talk to you?” And said “you know what? Yeah I do, I’m going up stairs. Have fun with the kids” and as I was walking up the stairs he yells “if you want a divorce just say that”.

Idk what to do. If I don’t feel how he expects me to feel, then I’m the one who’s mad, I’m the one who’s annoyed, and I’m the one who wants to end our relationship? I’m tireeeddddddddd