I need serious help!!! Please read

Hey guys. I really need some serious help here. Sorry I think it’s gonna be a long post. Anyhow I am with my husband for 5 years married 4. We don’t have any children. Guess we weren’t ready all this while as I believe I need to be financially secured first before we ttc.

We were going through rough times and talked about divorce since things weren’t falling into place related life, family etc. somehow we stayed together trying to get through these though times. January 2021 I get to know that’s he’s being cheating with another colleague of his and it was hell lot of mess and I know I should have left him at the same time. I guess I was just holding on to this relationship since I loved him. During this period I get to know he had slept with another co worker within 6 months of us being married while I was away for grieving my fathers death. I somehow confronted and he accepted and we moved on.

Fast forward today, he was working night shift and came home early morning and he was tiptoeing inside the room. Btw we lived in a shared apartment which is 3bedroom apartment. All the 3 rooms are shared by couples only. Mine is a master room so I have attached bathroom. Other rooms have a sharing bathroom which is just outside their room in the passage. So going back to the story, he usually comes inside the room and he goes straight to the bathroom to change his uniform. I just change my side and I see the lights off. I thought maybe he’s in the kitchen (shared one) making bf. But he didn’t change his uniform which was very unusual. I get up from the bed and try to check from my keyhole what was actually happening. I started shivering when I saw him peeking into the shared washroom watching a flat mate of mine having BATH. I got chills when I saw this happening and I just didn’t knew what to do next. I kept on looking through my keyhole about what was happening and I just got numb 😭😭I stayed at my door in shock until he came in and asked me what happened. The next thing I remember is that I slapped him hard I don’t even know how that happened. Next thing I tell him is that I am done and I need a divorce. He tried to hold and apologizes and says that he doesn’t know why he did it. And that it’s a good thing that I slapped him and now he’s in his senses and that’s he know it’s disgusting and he is guilty for what he did. I know ladies whatever he’s done is not acceptable.

I feel so miserable 😭 and I am typing this all in my bathroom. Please no hate/ negative comments I am just looking for some advice and insight. Thank you for reading this.