Any thoughts on home birth?

Question

Does anyone have any home birth stories to share?
I used to think I was afraid of the idea of birth. The pain and the fear I wouldn’t cope. But I have been soul searching recently and think it is not that which I am afraid of. I am afraid of feeling out of control, of not feeling safe and of medical Intervention without my real consent. Saying ‘we have to do x because baby is Y’ is not consent for me. I want to be asked.
My friend says I will forget all that in birth. I don’t believe it. And I also don’t want to.
I want to maintain my dignity and my bodily autonomy? Is what wrong?
She told me that as long as baby comes healthily then nothing else should matter? But it does. 
So I wondered if I would feel better with a home birth? But it will be my first. And maybe it’s risky.
I know I can speak to midwife and doctor about risks etc but I’d really like some real world stories and thoughts.
Thankyou x

Answer

I’m a big proponent of out-of-hospital birth (birth center or home birth). I was planning a birth center water birth but I caught Covid from my in laws and ended up going into preterm labor and had an emergency c-section. 
Having a healthy baby matters, but it’s absolutely not the “only” thing that matters. Your mental and emotional well-being is just as important as your physical well-being. A traumatic birth experience like mine has a lasting effect. My mom had me at home with a midwife and she called it a healing memory after her (unnecessary) c-section. She said if she could do it all over, she would have had all of us at home 
Home births are statistically safer for lower risk women, but it’s important to have a comfortable relationship with your practitioner, regardless of location of your birth. 
Check out The Positive Birth Book by Milli Hill. Because of that book, I was much more prepared to handle any birth outcome. Even though my birth plans basically went out the window, I made one for birth center, hospital vaginal, and emergency c-section outcomes. This helped me be more prepared to know what the common practices are, why they’re done, and what risks they can have so I could make an informed decision, either in the moment or ahead of time.
If I hadn’t listened to my gut, I would have lost my son and very likely my life, too. I had severe Covid, I almost died a few days after my surgery. My son thankfully thrived and only got better every day. But I advocated for myself (actually pissed off the doctor) and saved both of our lives. If I ever get pregnant again, I’ll still try for a birth center birth.

Answer

You can read my home birth story on my page about my second daughter Margaret. :) 
I chose a home birth for the very reasons you listed. I want to feel safe and in control and an active participant in the births of my kiddos. I know myself well enough that I feel safest at home during birth. I want to move how I see fit, relax in an environment I know and am familiar with, and not worry I’m on someone’s schedule/time clock. I want to feel seen, heard and valued as a birthing woman and I feel the midwifery model of care best meets those needs for me. 
My best advice is to interview a few midwives in your area, like you said. The following books were also really empowering for me when researching my birth options: 
- Ina May’s Guide to Childbirth by Ina May Gaskin
- Why Choose Home Birth by Monika Stone
- Spiritual Midwifery by Ina May Gaskin
I wish you the best birth experience no matter what you choose! Congratulations on your pregnancy!!💕

Answer

For low risk births, home births are statistically just as safe as a hospital birth. Our bodies were designed to do this, and women have been giving birth without hospitals for way longer than with them. I’m currently pregnant with our first and we are doing a home water birth with midwives. Ultimately the c section rate is higher at the hospital, I don’t want an epidural or to be told when to push, which is common practice at the hospital. I want to be able to labor and birth in a comfortable place at home where I can walk around, use the toilet, eat, etc. Using midwives with a home birth puts me in charge instead of the doctor on call at the hospital. I also am very concerned about delayed cord clamping, keeping the vernix on, immediate skin to skin, catching my own baby, and an uninterrupted first hour with the baby. These concerns for me are so often disregarded or not allowed at the hospital. Also, I really want a water birth which none of our local hospitals offer.

Answer

I had a homebirth and absolutely loved it (my story is in my profile)
I read a lot of books, talked extensively with my birth team, took birth prep classes, and had detailed birth plans for difference scenarios (ideal, in the event of complications, and in the event of emergency) and it made me feel so safe to know that everyone was on the same page with me no matter what. Of course a healthy baby is the end goal, but how you get there matters!

Answer

I’m due with my first December 6th! And I’ve decided to hve a home birth. Your first birth isn’t a practice! Why not make it or try to make it everything you want it to be. For healthy pregnancies home birth is just as safe as hospital births. I’ve done so much research, followed home birth Facebook groups, homebirth Instagram pages, saved positive affirmations and feel very confident with my body. You were made to birth your baby. 
You got this momma!

Answer

I've had both of my babies at home! I used the same midwife duo (mother/daughter team) for both. I had all of the same concerns you had about birth. I was more nervous about the hospital experience than my ability to have my baby. I had 2 very differently 'hard' labors but they were perfect. I took hypnobirthing for both 'the Mongan Method.'  I found the birth education and relaxation techniques are equally important.

Answer

I had a home birth with my daughter (2nd child) and planned one for my first but I was transferred to the hospital. 
I was low risk both times and had a doula who had two home births herself and she really helped me mentally prepare. We lived 5 minutes from the hospital and I felt very comfortable with my midwife team and their expertise, so when I did go into labor there was never a moment that I worried about baby. I was in my own room, surrounded by people I loved and trusted and we did intermittent fetal monitoring and I was able to get in birth tub right at the end of transition.
I will say, I did experience the fetal ejection reflex; that was where I did feel out of control and I got a little frightened because I wasn’t pushing; my body took over but my daughter was big. 10 lbs and 22 inches so I guess my body knew it needed to just take over to safely push her out in just 30 minutes. 
Healing from that birth was WAY easier than my hospital birth with Pitocin and an epidural. so needless to say I really enjoyed my home birth. 
I would just make sure any midwife you find is well trained and you really trust them ❤️ 
I’m currently pregnant again, but as a surrogate and cannot have a home birth but I think I found a hospital that will give me a similar feel!
I agree with you about it’s not just baby coming and being healthy that matters; birth is one of the most momentous experiences of our lives and it certainly does matter! 
Best of luck; soul searching is important business!

Answer

I just want to add that  if you do have a baby at the hospital you can refuse anything . They do not own you or your baby . You are free to tell them to stop, and or not receive an intervention no matter what that is . My best advise is to do your research. Prepare your self . But if your heart is telling you home birth then go for it , chances are that you won’t regret it . There’s a few great podcast that you should listen to Birthing Instincts and Down to Birth. The first is a home birth OBGYN (located in California) and a home birth Midwife that host and the second podcast is hosted by two women who are birth coaches (can’t remember exactly but they are located in Connecticut ) . But I highly recommend you checking out a few of each of their podcasts so much great info.

Answer

It’s just not what I would do. There are many doctors who say if you have a low risk pregnancy it’s just as safe as hospital birth. I just had a baby, and nobody ever made me do anything without my consent. they always asked if they could touch me etc. but when my baby and I did end up being in distress it was nice that the operating room was right down the hall.

Any thoughts on home birth?

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