Would you be upset?

Question

I know everyone has different views on covid, immunity, etc. but please be respectful of our opinion even if yours isn’t the same :)
I have a 7 1/2 month old and am pregnant again - high risk. We are thinking of not going anywhere for Thanksgiving this year because we don’t want to deal with possibly getting sick. We already had an issue where people didn’t tell us their child was sick and allowed them to get super close to us - baby got miserably sick, thankfully I didn’t get anything but I was scared I would. We REALLY don’t want to go through that again. The only issue we are seeing as a result of this is my SO’s family. His grandpa didn’t meet him even “pre-new pregnancy” because he doesn’t really talk to us and when we have tried to talk to him, he doesn’t respond and he has never asked to visit. (I know people will say “well he’s older”, but this man definitely knows how to use technology). But his family gives us shit for not visiting with them saying things like “it’s sad he hasn’t met the baby yet”. Especially because right now, they are sick and don’t know what they have, I’m definitely not in a rush for any visits. I don’t get why people are acting like RSV, covid, and other viruses are not spreading like they are right now. Or why it’s so hard to understand that with our circumstances, we want to stay healthy as possible.

Answer

I may not have answered  that correctly. I chose yes, as in I would be upset if my family harassed me and acted like respiratory viruses weren’t running rampant right now. I’m a pediatric RN and I have told my family and in laws that I won’t be having visitors for the holidays (I’m due December 14th) due to rsv running rampant in my area. Some understand some don’t, at this point I’m protecting my intermediate family and could care less how they feel.

Answer

I voted no. I wouldn’t be upset because they’re allowed to feel how they want. Their feelings wouldn’t change how I feel about it and their feelings aren’t my problem. Keeping my family safe is. I’d feel super comfortable and happy to maintain my boundaries regardless of what they think is sad. Truth is, it IS sad that we have so much to worry about that we can’t even allow loved ones to see a baby anymore. They didn’t say anything that isn’t true unfortunately. But that’s just the way it is. If they are constantly harassing you (I don’t think the one example you gave is harassing), then I’d be annoyed and I’d get assertive and ask them to stop and respect your decision to keep your family healthy.

Answer

Do whatever you both feel is comfortable

Answer

Yeah that’s a no-go for me. Do what you think is best for your family. You are not obligated to put your family at risk for family that clearly doesn’t make your relationship a priority.

Answer

Do what’s best for your family and don’t worry about other people. Trying not to get your child sick when being sick at this age could have serious co sequences isn’t living in fear, it’s called being a good parent.  
  
We’re limiting who sees my baby too, and will keep doing so for the foreseeable future. People who don’t like that can kick rocks.

Answer

I don’t care what it is. Sick is sick. I don’t care if it’s someone’s birthday, baby shower, holiday, whatever. If you’re sick me and my family are not coming anywhere near you.

Answer

it's always about what works for you and your family, I know grandpa is family too but doesn't need to be coddled like the baby and honestly like you need rn. man's not making the effort, maybe you could communicate that feels discouraging. old people love real letters :) maybe you two could correspond thru the pregnancy. you could send photos of your turkey dinner or bumb pics , it maybe more special

Answer

Do whatever you want it's your family's safety!
Covid is a big deal. 
If you're not comfortable then your not comfortable. You as a parent will make the right choice. Or you can have any one who meets your baby to wear a mask.

Answer

The only part I would be upset about is people guilt tripping. It’s absolutely reasonable to NOT be going to indoor events with people who have already proven themselves incapable of doing the right thing by staying away from others when they’re sick. Grandpa can reach out if he wants to meet the baby another time 🤷🏼‍♀️

Answer

My opinion- Nope I’m on grandpas side. Id be pissed if I couldn’t see a grandchild or my child. I’m not staying locked up in a house no matter what. I’m living my life and not being bunkered down cus of sickness going around. Yes be cautious but don’t stop living your life and that’s what you sound like you’ve done. There is ALWAYS gonna be sicknesses and something to worry about. I was diagnosed with cancer and I haven’t stopped my life at all. Been around 9 people with Covid half of them didn’t even know they had it till weeks later and didn’t get it.

Would you be upset?

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