he lied to me

back in the summer my boyfriend went into the army. he’s reserves so he got home a few months ago. while he was away i had problems with my birth control and stopped taking it. he begged me to not get back on it and would always talk about how he wanted to have a baby and swore he was ready. i was hesitant because i felt like he wasn’t. but he promised he was. this morning i found out i was pregnant. we weren’t necessarily trying but he knew i wasn’t on birth control, didn’t wanna wear condoms, n swore it would all be okay. now he wants me to have an abortion and i don’t want to. he says he’s not ready. i’m just confused because he went from begging me to have a baby to not wanting it. i’m so stressed and sad. i feel so guilty. i know i don’t want to get rid of this baby but i feel that i have to. we’ve been together for 4 years. we are young, but i work full time i could honestly do it without him. but i just don’t know what to do. SS of some of our conversations.