Anal Beginner - TMI

So I know it’s something my husband wants and I’d like to give it to him but I need advice. I can’t get past the fact that I 💩 out of that and that’s literally what anal feels like to me (with a toy - I have never successfully done it with my husband, it hurts.) Which I’ve recently realized may have been because 1 I wasn’t fully comfortable and 2 we weren’t using enough lube. But like, how do you PREPARE??? I’ve tried using my dildo in the shower beforehand, poop comes out. Give myself and enema, poop comes out. So all I can think of is getting poop on him and there’s nothing sexy about it so I end up super uncomfortable and out of mood. Any pointers?? 😂 TMI, sorry 🤷‍♀️