Unhappy

My boyfriend and I have been together for 6 years. There is a 25 yr age difference between us. Before I got into the relationship I talked to him about me wanting a child he said yes we would have one. He proposed to me in 2018 but never wanted to pick a wedding date. I've been speaking about marriage since he proposed. Now I'm 39 yrs old and nothing has happened. He recently told me I never came to him and gave him a plan about having a baby. I felt he was holding back all them years so I wouldn't get pregnant. Now I'm unhappy feeling like my time was wasted he already knew what he wanted from the beginning, but I also feel like why leave my child bearing days are over. Might as well stay I'm not go get what I want. Am I stupid for feeling this way?