I’m stressed & confused need to VENT

I been with my bf for a year… he smoke weed when i met him i just knew wasn’t my type i didn’t want to be mean so i kept texting him idk but we clicked and i fell for him. He didn’t smoke around me or my kids for maybe 4 months into the relationship but then he started sleeping over and some how moved in 🤷🏼‍♀️ idk me being dumb and in love i gave into his likings. I would smoke too alone with him at first i hated it still do. (Im dumb) well i started to let him smoke in my truck. At first i was ok with it but now i hate it so much .. i talked to him about it he gets mad!! 😭😭 4 months ago i started to let him get on to my boys bc their dad has never been in their lives and my boys are hard headed so they needed a man voices getting on to them. Well i told him it was ok to spank them but in front of me ! And now i feel like hes over doing it sometimes and I’m scared 😭🥺 please don’t give me bs bc i know i did wrong. But being with him isn’t like being in my past toxic relationships he doesn’t hit me or talk shit to me. But i just don’t know what to do. He loves my kids but i don’t like him hitting them so hard he left a bruise on my 4 year olds butt 💔 it broke me. I’m tired i just want my kids to be loved like how i love them