Boyfriend looking up “porn”

I’m at a loss here. My boyfriend and I have been together 3 and a half years . We have an 8 month old daughter. At the beginning of our relationship we spoke about our thoughts about porn. I told him I wasn’t okay with it & that if he wanted to be with me he had to be willing to not watch porn or any kind of naked women online. If he wasn’t willing to give it up then fine I wouldn’t make him, but I couldn’t be with him because I felt really strongly about that being equivalent to cheating. He said he didn’t need to watch that because he had me & agreed.

Since then I’ve caught him searching porn twice. Just a couple weeks ago I told him I couldn’t have this same conversation again. It hurt me so much knowing he was watching those things even though I was right here every night. Now last night he went to Reddit to show me something but I guess he didn’t realize he didn’t delete his search history so the first thing that popped up was “titties” “nice girls” “big ass” . First he said he didn’t search it 🙄 then he said I was overreacting and insecure . Now he just refuses to talk about it with me. I’m literally in tears. He knows how i feel about it. He knows I try to initiate sex so much almost every night & he always claims to be too tired. He doesn’t really show me affection. He says I have too high of a sex drive but he’s searching those things? It doesn’t make sense to me. Idk what to do anymore. Idk how to make myself more desirable or what to change about me so he doesn’t look at that. I’m so tired of feeling like I’m not enough