AITA (TTC)

TW: miscarriage

My husband and I recently got married, a little over two months ago. We’ve been trying to conceive baby #1 for about a year and a half after we lost put first baby. I have PCOS, I don’t have a period regularly, I don’t ovulate on my own and my GYN put me on letrozole so that I can ovulate.

Okay, when we made the decision for me to start talking the letrozole, we had a decision about stopped behaviors.

Smoking weed, smoking tobacco and drinking. I understand people use whatever they use in order to feel good, but… we had an agreement, he’d stop all for a week before I ovulate and won’t pick back up again until after I’m done ovulating, which I think is a pretty good deal, considering doctors, research and people in TTC community has told me we can get better results if his side activities are stopped or controlled. We haven’t been okay for the past 4 days because he went back on his word. He drank, he’s been smoking cigarettes, milds, weed.. and I feel so frustrated.

The medication took a lot out of me and we don’t succeed this cycle, I’ll have to do it again. I don’t know if I want to forgive him for taking back his word…

Am I the asshole?