Found a list with girls my fiance has slept with

Yupp, and it wouldn't be an issue but we have been together for 5 years. And there are 4 female's names listed AFTER mine!!! Of course when I asked him about it he says the list isn't in any specific order, which I know is bullshit because I know who and when he slept with (previous women) as he has kids with them. The girls name listed before mine is his ex before we got together and the girl right after me is the girl he slept with when we were on a break...I'm at a loss, I'm devastated! I'm so hurt! How could the person that said they would never hurt me, hurt me more than anyone ever has!! 5 years waisted, one kid together and on the way....😭😭😭 who and why tf are there people listed after me!!! I already know the answer, I just needed to vent a little because I have nobody to go talk to