How do you let go of someone toxic me and my children’s father met in 2018? I was 17 and he was 23. He’s always been a little abusive from the start but me being 17 years old and having really bad anxiety. That’s the best I thought I could get, because why would want to be with someone like me who’s socially awkward weird I was just out of a long-term relationship so that’s the best I thought I could get and he acted like he was going to be there for me and our kids and so stupidly. I got pregnant when I was 18 years old, he cheated on me when I was pregnant and I for gave him because I didn’t know what to do. I was five months pregnant and then we moved in together and two months after my son was born he chose drugs over me and his son so I told him he had to leave, and he never looked back, and I got pregnant again while on birth control I didn’t want to sleep with someone I didn’t know and I get worried about bringing someone else in my kids life because he’s a little psycho and I just feel like I won’t find anybody because I have two kids and he always tells me how my body is trash my vagina is loose how nobody’s gonna want me how ugly I’m just so unhappy. I’ve been thinking about suicide, but I’m just too scared to do it, I’ve been a single mom since I was 19 years old and I’m trying but I’m scared no one‘s gonna want to be with me because I want to be a stay at home mom because I cannot go out in public. I’ve had a lot of violence in my life and I’ve seen things I should’ve seen in a traumatize me and I’ve been bullied my whole life so I’m literally scared of people can I just have so much anxiety that I can’t even function like a normal I take a lorazepam but it like doesn’t do anything but how do you be happy I’m just so angry and mad at the way he’s done me and my children he literally left and Never looked back like he acted like he was gonna move back in when I was pregnant with my second. He never did he got a house five minutes up the street he never sees his kids. I feel like he just got that house so he could see what I’m doing but not. Deal with the responsibility of having kids and I just feel like I am struggling. I think my son has autism is super hard to deal with sometimes I feel bad for him and it’s just like everything is becoming so overwhelming. Is there any of your stories where you have a kid and you found someone else I just don’t wanna be lonely my whole life because I have been I love my kids  but I have no friends or anything is there hope for me is there red flags to watch out for with men you when you have kids I am just worried about being someone else in my kids life because my moms bfs abused me i know my bd wouldn’t hurt my kids just me that’s why I think I let him stick around always gives me empty promises please don’t be mean I am young and dumb I just need help and advice