Am I the asshole ?

Been having the same fight with my boyfriend of 4 years for over a year already. (Father of our almost 2 yr old) I talk he doesn’t listen, sometimes it feels like I’m talking to myself or the only person in the room. If I say something it’s completely ignored if another person says something after me he then responds. I’m so tired of feeling like I don’t matter. He’s always on the phone at dinner time or anytime really doesn’t really talk to me much. I feel ignored. He also doesn’t touch me really at all. If I don’t initiate touch kiss hug hand holding or even just lay next to him at night in bed we can go for ever without it. My love language is to be listened to, to be feel loved touch is very important. We’ve gone almost a week already without touch, LITTLE conversation. I tell him how I feel at the end of the day but he says it’s always the same fight. I tell him I hate this conversation the same fight over and over. He tells me he loves me, he doesn’t want us to break up. He says he wants to be a family and loves me and respects me, says he’ll try harder and he’ll change. Same argument last night same outcome this morning. Didn’t even tell me good morning and on his phone during breakfast. I try to speak but no response, or just very late response. How to I gain the strength to leave ? He’s a great dad always helps changes diapers bathes her plays with her, him being father isn’t an issue it’s being a partner. We went on vacation still the same thing. I can’t see him with anyone else I’d loose my shit, would want to fight a girl if I’m being honest, how do I stop caring. I don’t deserve this. I say I want a break but once I see him out the door I want him home. Idk what’s wrong with me I know I don’t want this but I stay with him.