Why do I like this?!

Okay, this is private for obvious reasons lol.

I was a virgin when I got married. I had absolutely zero sexual experience or knowledge really.

My husband, well let’s just say I was the sweet innocent girl and my husband was the tattooed muscular guy that my parents didn’t like 😂 anyways he’s obviously sexually experienced.

He is a really good man, our marriage is amazing.

He’s encouraged me to explore my sexuality a lot, and lately he’s been making these morbid jokes,,, that I find I actually am super turned on by the idea of it and I don’t know what to do with that 😅

He’s extremely kinky I will preface with that and he’s slowly, at the pace I’m comfortable with, been introducing me to the kink world. One of his major kinks is the whole “forced” breeding thing.

We have two small kids already, and both of them were “unplanned”. And I don’t want this to paint him in a bad light because he was not truly forcing pregnancies on me, we had discussed beforehand and revisited to confirm/agree that I was fine with a pregnancy if it happened, but we weren’t actively trying. So when he kinda made it happen it wasn’t against my wishes or anything and he would NOT have gotten me pregnant on purpose if I truly didn’t want a baby. I’m still trying to understand the intricacies of all this kink stuff, so please forgive my wording. Everything between us IS consensual even if it’s a consensual “non-consent” type of thing. Anyways lately he’s been making jokes about “forcibly” getting me pregnant again, and while I’m not crazy about the idea at the moment which I told him and he’s respected that of course, I find I’m super turned on by the idea and I don’t understand why. Do I just share the same kink he does here too or something?? Does anyone else have the same thoughts on it? I feel confused as to why the idea makes me so hot 😆