Huge insecurity

I really just need to vent and hopefully get other peoples insight.  When I had my son 6 years ago I had to have a c section. During my pregnancy I had gained 50 lbs and the last month I grew soo many stretch marks it wasn't even funny.  The whole time I was pregnant I was using cocoa butter lotions and mothers oil, I look like a darn zebra! :(.  I lost all of the weight since then but am extremely embarrassed of my body! Because of the c section I have a ton of excess skin, a big scar, and lots of ugly stretch marks.  I am a single mom and can't afford to get surgery.  I absolutely hate looking at myself in the mirror and can only imagine what my boyfriend thinks of me.  Everytime we get intimate I keep my shirt on, I have only let him see my stomach a couple times. I don't know what to do because I know that my insecurities with myself cause problems in our relationship but I can't help it.  Does anyone have any advice on how to make the scars/marks less noticeable?

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