Relationship advice

I've been married to my husband for almost 6 years but only started living together 2 years ago do to immigration issues. I love my husband but I'm hurt also. I'm 37 in few weeks and want to have kids. He always holds grudges how when he wanted them I wasn't ready. While I've always wanted kids I did not want to be raising them as a single mom. During our years apart I'd go visit him once a year for a month as he was overseas. Now I always feel bored at home and don't know what to do. I don't feel as I'm living a quality life.