What exactly makes a woman good in bed?

Enthusiasm trumps experience and tricky moves, and the best sex can't be measured by one person's performance. It's about give-and-take, understanding your partner, and unpredictability—so pounce on him when he least expects it. 

The only time my husband wants to have sex is at night, when I'm too tired. Why can't he be more flexible?

You both ought to be more flexible. If you're into wake-up sex, ask him what it will take for him to rise to the occasion. He may be more willing if you accommo¬date him once in a while too. Sure, it's tough to summon the energy for a drawn-out sex session after a long day, but you can take the pressure off with an after-work quickie before exhaustion settles in. Or ask him for a 5-minute massage to help you shed the tension of the day—and you both get in the mood. 

My guy is never romantic. How can I get him to step it up?

Lame hints or jabs about your coworker's massive rose delivery will only add to the pressure he probably already feels. Take the stress off by telling him you're okay with whatever he comes up with, whether it's watching the sunset together or mowing a heart into the lawn. That said, it's fair to tell him your favorite kind of flower or the name of a restaurant you want to try. 

My guy skips the kissing and goes straight for the main event. How can I get him to slow down?

He's jumping the gun because he knows he can. Slow his roll the next time he tries skipping steps, then remind him just how hot it was before he'd seen the promised land. Your best bet: taking things outside, like to a park. There's no better time than late summer to sprawl out on a picnic blanket, pop a bottle of white, and start whispering dirty ideas in his ear and kissing a little. The public setting will cuff his wandering hands. Wait until he's frothing at the mouth, then tell him it's time to go home. You'll break 14 traffic laws en route, rock the bed off the box springs, and make your point: Good things come to those who wait. 

I have a role-playing fantasy, but I'm not sure he'll be into it. How should I bring it up?

If you're shy about revealing your raunchier daydreams or if sex between you has been vanilla so far, start small. Maybe you slip on a pair of four-inch pumps and suddenly you're his sexy secretary, or a pair of cowboy boots turns him into a rough rider. "Finding" something in the room to spark the role-play makes it seem less premeditated, and will ease the transition for both of you. 

Does expensive lingerie really turn guys on, or is it just a big waste of money?

Ever see a 10-year-old tear into a Christmas present? That's pretty much what lingerie does to a guy. The better the packaging, the sooner it's stripped off, so think twice before dropping half your paycheck on velvet hems, tulle trim, or mother-of-pearl clasps. Though guys do appreciate the effort, most are satisfied with the simple stuff: silky favorites and skimpy cuts that hug your curves like a roadster on the California coast.