Is breast really best?

Question

Alright so I'm a formula feeding mom. I tried very hard to breast feed my child and she wasn't eating at all. I just wasn't producing enough milk. My daughter is 13 months now and is on soy milk due to a cows milk allergy. She drank formula from newborn (ish) until just recently. I know breastfeeding is great and I wish I could have been able to try it more. However, since I wasn't able to, I noticed a different side of mothering. One that I never want to be apart of. I was judged so horribly to the point where I cried every single day feeling like I was a horrible mother because I couldn't breastfeed. 
I told myself that I will try harder with my next... Until my sister in law told me something that worried me. She had problems nursing with her first and was able to pull it off beautifully with her second and third. She told me that she has a stronger bond with her second than she has ever had with her first. She said she didn't want to say that "she loved the second more but that's how it is."

Is this true?! I love my daughter and would kill and die for her. I could NEVER love a child more or less. Am I missing something here or does this sound a little sad to everyone else?

Sorry for my novel here. I'm just confused and tired of feeling like I'm looked down on for bottle feeding.

Answer

Being a mother that breastfed, I don't think I could ever love any child more than another. Don't get me wrong, the bond is great, but I know that formula feeding moms bond just as well and love their babies just as much. Don't ever feel badly or like you failed, you feed your child and you love your child, and to me, that's more important than the WAY you feed your child. Keep up the good work mama!!!

Answer

People adopt babies and can't breastfeed. And are still amazing parents! This certainly doesn't make or break you as a parent.  You tried, that's all you can do. The time you spend with your child is more important than what he eats the first year of his life. Love will last longer than the milk based diet. I'm sorry she said that to you.

Answer

13 months I'm still breastfeeding now

Answer

I was breast fed and me and my mum never bonded. 
She bottle fed my brother and the sun shines out his ass.
I bottle fed my son and we have an amazing relationship. To be fair I would have breast fed but mum took over and wouldn't let me hold him while he was awake she'd have me cleaning the house or doing other things instead of being with him. I'd make up the bottle and she wouldn't hand him over to be fed by me. 
I did at one point try to breast feed but he kept being sick and I felt that he got more out of the formula. After a month I moved out but she got her beloved control back when I went back to work.

Anyway it doesn't matter I love my son more than anything we bonded in other ways. Yes he loves her too but he knows I'm his mum and he never allowed her to soothe him.

Answer

Nutritionally, breast is best. Bonding is different between breastfeeding mothers and formula moms but that doesn't mean it's nonexistent, just different. Just be confident in the decisions you made. Breastfeeding mothers get as much shit as formula moms, trust me. It's a losing argument so just be confident with your mothering and ignore people's comments.

Answer

Oh sweetie, don't let negative people get you down! I breastfed my son for a month before he tore my nipples to the point they bled badly. I ended putting him on formula, but I didnt lose the bonding, because you can still bottle feed with skin to skin contact, snuggles, and just loving on them. Never let someone bring you down, blessings.

Answer

I had a difficult time breastfeeding as well with my first. I of course used formula. I don't believe that the bonding issue comes from how your child gets their nutrition. I struggled with this as well because I had friends who breastfed and their little ones seemed to "need" them more. I seriously think it was all in my head. Babies have their own unique personalities and some are more loving than others. My son has always been very independent since day one. I do think the skin to skin contact gives babies more comfort, but not having that doesn't affect them harshly. My son is very happy, playful, and lovable. Please don't beat yourself up and do what works best for you and your baby. These "mom wars" are ridiculous. Breastfeeding is awesome and kudos to those that women who have been able to do it, but at the end of the day we are all parents. That's all that matters.

Answer

I breastfed my daughter from the day she was born, until she was about 4 and a half months. Before she was born, I had originally intended to breastfeed until she was a year old because I heard it helps with brain and growth development steadily until they're a year old. I read up on both the benefits of formula feeding and bottle feeding and were satisfied with both, but decided to try breastfeeding first. My daughter latched right on and there were no complications. And came easily for us, and I think the hardest part for me was the fact that I was a college student and could not just breastfeed. School started back 3 days after I delivered my daughter and I had to go back, so I had to introduce the playtex nurser bottles then. I loved it, it created a bond between my daughter and I. But, at 4 months I stopped producing milk because I was pumping or feeding enough due to being in college so I dried up. I really do recommend it, and there's absolutely nothing wrong if you can't do it. My nephew couldn't due to the fact that he was born a month early.

Answer

I breastfeed and it's true what they but the reason it's true is not because that breast feeding makes you closer it's because if people don't breastfeed often times put the feeding responsibility on others....

They go out for hours without their child where breastfeeding mothers often don't have that option because they feeding their child....

They don't get up every feeding in the night they have they SO/DH get up and help too. Where again breastfed babies have mommy everytime....

So it's all about the choices you make not breastfeeding doesn't make you not as close to your child YOU do by choosing to alow others to take away a precious time you could spend together

Hope I was able to help some!

Answer

I haven't personally breast fed, but I have helped my fiancé raise his son since birth. His bio mom insisted on breast feeding and couldn't produce enough or enough of quality, not exactly sure, but refused to make a change or supplement. He was diagnosed with failure to thrive for several months, was super cranky, never content, cried ALL the time, nothing soothes him, and he flatlined on his weight and growth. Then the doctor INSISTED she stop and she finally did, and the change in him was amazing. Weight gain, happy child, sleeping, alert, playful...it was like night and day.

I don't think breast feeding is for every mother or every child.

Is breast really best?

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