Pregnancy/life/friend venting

Sorry in advance, and think what you will, I have no one to talk to and I know I'm gonna get a ton of keep the baby comments.

I have been showing pregnancy signs for 2 weeks now, swelling, vomiting, cravings, the whole 9 yards...

I tell my good friend this -I guess he's my best friend, but he is very extroverted and I'm the opposite, anyway...

Obviously he's aware I'm a grown woman that knows her options, abortion being one of them of course. Why that option? Because I'm in the middle of a 8 year degree, I'm jobless but my fiance works 2 to feed us and help me get through school as fast as possible on pale grants with usually15 hours a semester depending on prerequisites. We never go to the doctor unless we think we're going to die, we have a roof over our heads because I clean my dads house in exchange for board (and I'm positive he would throw us out if I were pregnant). It's all bills and what's left is gas and food at this point. -we're not married because they give you less pale grant if you are btw.. in case you EVER need that info, because if you ask they likely won't tell you.

I have miscarried 3 times prior, and of course there's that underlying thought of what if this is my last chance? So in a way, I do want to be pregnant. (Notice how I said that? I haven't taken a test yet because I haven't been to town, yet he's got a bug up his ass about this.) But, obviously, I'm not in a position to be a good parent if I can't even provide food or clothes or whatever, can I? He is telling me all the food stamps and free help I can *possibly* get. He would know, he's almost 40 and living off this stuff with his newish gf and son. I don't want to have to leech off people my entire life, and having a baby would put me 10 step back. I know for a fact they're ttc, and failing because she's got something wrong with her uterine lining that she bleeds almost constantly. (Yeah, you heard me. Almost 40, not married, ttc with a new gf, and on food stamps. He also cant find a job and is fighting for custody of the son he has. I will give him that he's a better parent then that ex wife of his by leaps and bounds.)

My fiance wants me to get a abortion if I do end up being pregnant, but we don't exactly have the cash to do so and if these symptoms are this heavily present I know I have been longer than what natural remedies can help with.

So this is just great. Wanna know the golden turd of all this?? I'm on bc, and have been for 2 years. So I'm pretty certain I'm stressing out over nothing, and my friend's a idiot who just ruined his chances of us talking again. He told me twice to think about how him and his gf feels -since they can't have one. Are you fucking serious?! Are YOU gonna cover my medical bills? The diapers? Pay me back the 18+ extra time? Are you gonna babysit for me -if I was desperate enough to let my child in your house? ...

I'm done.