Not On Birth Control and Judged For It
Hello! I'm a woman in my early 20's, and I have a unique set of reproductive problems! Hahah
You see, I became sexually active at 18, in a committed relationship (at the time), and decided to take birth control. I got it for free at the health department clinic, and I thought I was being responsible.
4 months later, I ended up nearly dying in the hospital from a pulmonary embolism (more or less my right lung was filled with blood and fluid and it was dying - so naturally, I was, too).
Turns out I am part of a unique less than 1% who has blood prone to clotting, and after that the doctors told me I could never use any form of hormonal both control again.
As it turns out, we figured out that I also have PCOS (poly-cystic ovarian syndrome), and am prone to sporadic and inconsistent ovulation, and ovarian cysts. The treatment for this is usually birth control, but I have to use the old fashioned method, which is shed as much fat as possible, so that less of my estrogen is absorbed.
I also process insulin differently, so I have to be very careful about what I eat. It is a struggle.
But I digress.
See, I of all people would obviously LOVE to take birth control. In fact, I get annoyed with young girls who don't when they have the ability.
And considering my sporadic ovulation tendencies, I can't predict my cye all too well, so I have to be very careful with sex.
Thing is THIS: People ask if you're on birth control. Women/friends/coworkers do when the discussion comes up. Men that I date also ask, too, or just assume that I'm in my 20's and responsible, so I am.
Do you know how much JUDGMENT I get because I'm not on it? I tell a guy that I am not on birth control, and I immediately become less attractive. I tell female friends, and before I even explain, they think I am irresponsible. And then when I try to explain it to people, they think I'm coming up with a bullshit excuse.
I have a PHYSICAL INABILITY to take it. It's rare, but it's a real thing. Exposure to synthetic hormones over time will give me blood clots. It's a fact.
I guess I am just whining, but SERIOUSLY?! He stops calling because he "doesn't think he can be in a relationship where he has to worry about the woman getting pregnant." Or she, my friend "thinks that there must be some other options for me."
There are none. Except condoms and spermicide(which luckily, causes no yeast infections or burning for me), but thats it.
So please, when someone tells you that they're not on the pull for health reasons, do not judge them.
I mean, I have no choice. Some of us really don't.
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