Husband says I'm being too hard on our daughter...

Okay, so our daughter will be 6 in September and will start kindergarten in August. She was in the preschool program at the local elementary school this past year and I purchased her a summer bridge activity book. Every morning I do flash cards with her and have her trace her letters and we read a book. In the evening I give her 6 pages of from her work book, front and back. He says this is too much. She hasn't complained. Thoughts? 
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COMMENT (31)

Re

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As a teacher (middle school), I think it is better for you to wait. Here's why:1) She will ALWAYS be physically and emotionally younger than her peers. Her social skills will always be behind.  This will really start to show and have an impact when she enters middle school. Think about it: while your baby has just turned 11, she will have to change in a locker room of girls that are closer to 12 or 13. While she will still be interested in toys and playing games, the majority of her female peers will have already developed an interest in boys, sex, and gossip. While she doesn't care about her body, other girls will comment on how "underdeveloped" she is. None of this has anything to do with how smart she is. 2) As soon as she starts school, you are BOTH tied to rigid schedule, blanket statements and rules, and being addressed as a number (yes, even kinder teachers are overwhelmed and might not remember that your baby's favorite color is blue, her middle name is X, and that you work full time). This means less creativity and freedom for your daughter. I'm a believer in the school system, but there will never be another time in your daughter's life when she us free of responsibilities and can just play. 3) She may be smart thanks to your Flashcards and summer workbook, but how's her independence? Can she self-soothe and problem solve or resolve conflicts with other children, or does she tattle and need guidance before moving past a difficulty? Is she ok with a struggle and will work through it, or does she come to you as soon as a question is challenging? Can she open her own juice? Can she zip her own jacket? Button her own pants? Believe it or not, these are more the skills your child needs for kinder more so than being able to read. It makes a teacher's job exponentially difficult when we have to teaching emotional and social skills along with the academics. 

R

R • Jul 13, 2015
wow this is great info. I don't have kids but hearing this from someone who sees a spectrum of abilities in kids on a daily basis is great

Re

Reggie • Jul 10, 2015
Thanks for understanding! I was so embarrassed when I realized what I did! @Lisa: you're absolutely right. 😊

Da

Danii • Jul 10, 2015
That's okay! I figured it was a misunderstanding and just wanted to double check :)

La

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As a preschool worker and a mom to another 6 year old girl who loves to learn it doesn't sound like too much. Then again if she complains please please do not push her!! It makes it harder for us in the classroom if they get burnt out before they ever get to us. Like I said earlier my daughter craved it and was reading before she left preschool! Every child is different! :) If she loves it go for it. Enjoy!

Am

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My mom started me young and I ended up towards the top percentile of my class keep doing what you're doing. She will tell you when it's too much for her. 

An

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Ive taught 4th for ten years. I think what you are doing is amazing. I see so many children lacking basic skills and work ethic.

Go

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I'd say if she's having fun and not getting frustrated (overly frustrated) with the work keep it up!

Br

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I say 6 pages front to back is to much.  Half of that is better and doing them with her and doing it in a fun way is the way to go so she doesn't feel like she's still in school. But wanting her to keep her on top of her education is a good thing. If she likes it too then I see no reason for you to give her less. If she feels it's to much then definitely give her less.  Good job. 

Ke

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I am a kindergarten teacher and encourage families to spend at least 30 minutes a day working with their children. I say read to them, do the flash cards, have them trace letters and numbers. Make it fun for them, have them help cook and measure things. Use magnetic letters or play dough to make letters or words. Workbook pages don't really have them retain things well. They don't really enjoy them. I also say 6 pages is too much. Look on Pinterest and find some fun and creative ways to help your chin learn vs the work book. 

Li

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If you're giving her homework assignments, I think that's a bit much at that age. However, studying together, reading together, & teaching/learning together is fine. But I wouldn't be filling her free time with stuff that is more toward feeling like homework. I remember "daycare" with a babysitter who cared for multiple kids, which was good for early socialization/etc, and then preschool which was good for adding in activities that taught stuff, and at home we would do fun activities that taught things without feeling like work (and tons of bookreading & bedtime stories together). I mean, i suppose she will let you know if it's too much, but at the same time, it can be hard on a kid to feel like if they don't keep doing it, they'll disappoint their parents, so they might not speak up if they just want to go be a kid sometimes. Or it can stick with them down the line where they might feel like they always need to be doing some kind of productive work if they want to be considered worthy and not lazy/slacking.

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When she's an adult, she'll thank you for it. 😉

Cr

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Maybe 6 pages feint and back are a little much every day. Maybe half would be OK?