Am I right or is he wrong ??

Question

So he asks me
Him : hey babe have you read any articles on autism? Like why or how babies get it ? 
Me:no I don't read that kind of stuff . I feel like my 2boys are healthy so why should I look at the negative..why? 
Him: oh because I'm just asking ! They say it's something to do with things women do while in there most important stage (trimester1) or men's genetics 
Me: well I don't do anything I'm not supposed to and haven't! Soooo

Then never ending argument... Now we're not talking

My whole thing is why ask me ?
 I feel almost like its a jinx and he says I just have issues and must be self conscious about something??? Wtfff

Answer

Reading about autism its not being negative its being intelligent for wanting to be informed about it and everything happening in this world...

Answer

Seemed like a casual conversation to me. And as a parent of an autistic child, it has nothing to do with anything the mother does in her first trimester, just fyi.

Answer

I really think this was a misunderstanding. It seems like he is just worried like any parent would be and just wanted to talk with you about what he had read about it. I am the same way about feeling like I will be jinxed if it's talked about but it really doesn't mean your daughter won't be healthy. I do think an apology is owed to him and I know you don't do maybe just talk it out with him so you both can move forward from this and quit being mad. Good Luck

Answer

Seems like you could of handled the situation diffrently. I'm sure he sits and listens to random questions you ask him. No need to be rude to your so.

Answer

Why ask you? Because it's substance for an intellectual conversation.

Answer

He is right, you are wrong. He was being an informative and very concerned individual for the future, you just completely lost your cool over something simple. Autism is so common in children, it doesn't mean anyone did anything wrong, it means life happened. Apologize. You really need.to

Answer

This sounds like a totally innocent conversation. I'm sorry it even caused an argument. That seems ridiculously petty. I'm the type of person who researches and studies everything too. I had a healthy son in May with absolutely no signs that would have led me to believe he'd be born otherwise.. But I still researched everything I could. I asked my husband to be the same so that we could discuss new studies together and make hypothetical decisions just in case we ever found ourselves in those shoes. A good partnership, for me, is always being able to have stimulating conversation. Always being able to discuss and prepare. We also both find these things genuinely interesting.

Answer

I'm sorry...but you are wrong and he is right. I don't understand why you would get so offended that he asked. Autism is not rare and early detection is a huge key to living with Autism. As someone that has worked with clients with Autism I've seen the difference early intervention can make. I wish you the best with your new baby and hope that you do not face having a child with Autism. As someone that has been trying to conceive for almost two years I know that when I have a baby  I will be looking for early signs so I could give my baby the best assistance if needed.

Answer

I REALLY don't think he was suggesting you were doing anything wrong. You even said yourself that he said "or mens genetics"... He isn't accusing you of doing anything wrong. He's your SO and he should be able to talk to you about ANYTHING. If you were slightly concerned about something like this and brought it to his attention hoping that he would sort of calm your worries, how would you feel if he reacted the way that you did? I'm sorry to say but in this situation, it isn't him that needs to apologize.

Answer

Those are normal conversations to have when expecting. I wouldn't take it personally. There are no definite answers on why autism occurs so don't get offended when people bring up theroies on autism. My fiancé and I talk about that stuff too. Getting mad is a normal response too. The idea of ever doing something wrong is scary and upsetting. I think you're okay.

Am I right or is he wrong ??

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