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Verbal Abuse? 😣
There's no nice way to say this, but I'm gonna get straight to the point. I've been married for a little over a year. My husband has anger problems to say the least. Don't get me wrong I have my share of being hormonal, snappy, and mean sometimes. However my husband has a history of yelling and cursing at me. Calling me inappropriate names out of anger and punching holes in the wall. I've already tried suggesting couples counceling but my husband keeps saying we can work on our issues together. Long story short, he's a good man with a big heart but when his anger comes out he says the most hurtful things. I suffer with depression so this doesn't help but we have a 9 month old baby boy, and I swear our son is what keeps me going. If we didn't have this sweet little baby I probably would have given up on our relationship by now, or even worse, given up on myself. I'm so tired of being yelled at and torn down by his words. When we get into a disagreement or if he gets overly angry at something it's like I'm being yelled at by a drill sergeant. Standing there trying to stay strong as he yells and tells me to look at him and show him respect... Today he got mad that I "complain about my lack of sleep due to our son" he went on about how I need to sleep when the baby sleeps. Makes perfect sense but somehow a conversation turned into a huge fight. He got so angry I started shaking and had a panic attack... It's been almost a year since I had a panic attack like that :( . He was yelling so loud and was so angry that our 9 month old started crying because he got scared. I told him to stop yelling he was scaring the baby, and my husband said "to bad."
I'm still feeling in shock and extremely down. I feel like in order to keep going each day I have to set my emotions aside and look out for my son. Protect my son and myself. My husband has never hit me or became physical but his anger and hitting doors and throwing things makes me wonder if it may just get worse.
My parents divorced... I don't want to consider that but I have many times because I want what's best for my son and of course myself as well. I'm so torn, I don't know what to do. He refuses to go get help/counceling on his own or even with me...
Am I stuck here?? Is there any other way out or solution? Please... I'm desperate for advice , comfort, anything 😔