Is he guilty?

Question

A while back (maybe 6 months ago) I had a house party where like usual I decided to drink away all my problems in the comfort of my home surrounded by my friends. A guy was there that has continuously attempted to get with me any sexual way possible and was continually ignored and turned down. He wasn't drinking. Instead he was continually calling rematches to beer pong in which he drank water. All I remember after that was him pouring me shots. A lot of them. After that I blacked out only coming to one time. My best friend had walked in my room and all I wanted to do was ask her for help but I couldn't find my words or strength to remove myself from him. He had fully taken advantage of me and she did nothing but apologize for walking in..
The next thing I know it's the next morning and I woke up naked with him in my bed. I instantly freaked out and made him leave. I didn't call it rape for this entire time though so many people told me it was. But about 4 days ago I had my first herpes outbreak. It's the most painful things I've ever endured and it put me in such a state of depression that I can't even begin to think of how I can get out. I pretended that what he did never happened. I didn't like to think about it and I only told a select few people, and the only reason I even told them was because with how low I felt after it happened I didn't know what I was going to do. I thought about self harm and I was sick of waking up in a pool of sweat after the nightmares I endured. 
The thing is, I'm currently with the man of my dreams, my biggest high school crush that I never did get over even after being 23. He's military and we married just after a short period. I couldn't be happier! But now after this outbreak I don't know what to tell him or how to tell him. I never knew before now and I wish I had. I wouldn't wish this upon anyone.
I'm not certain that I got it that night, but it's likely and after I forgave myself for getting so vulnerable and letting something like that happen, I'm devastated once again.

Answer

You can sue this guy. Take him to court. Talk to the police.

Answer

My cousin  has herpes and when  I went  to the doctor  with her, he said  that there is no telling  how  long  you have  had it bc it can lay dormant  for months sometimes years  . With that being  said I do feel  strongly  that  you  have  to  be completely  honest  with  your  hubby  and tell him what  happened  to you and that  you  think  that you  got this as a result  of  that situation .  It might  be wise  to  have  your  hubby  tested to see  if  he has it as well.  Just  for  your  information , my cousin  only  had that  one  outbreak  and  has never had one since and it's been 19 years .  That  doesn't  mean  she  doesn't  still have  it and carry it and it can  come out at any  time , but I guess  it  is  a common  thing  that people  only  get  one  outbreak  and never  have  it again .  I hope  for  you that this is the same .  I'm so  sorry  you  had  to  deal  with  this  and now  to have  to  have  it resurface.  I hope  things  get  better  for you .  Good  luck  and  god bless .

Answer

In sorry to tell you this, I have herpes too but the man that raped you wasn't the one that gave you herpes. You wouldn't have gotten your outbreak months later it would have happened days, weeks at most. As herpes lies dormant it was probably your husband that gave you it, I was with my boyfriend for over a year before I contracted herpes from him and I never cheated and he was and still is my only sexual partner. Sorry to tell you this but you deserved to know xx

Answer

Did this occur while you were married or before? How long ago was it? If its been years then you likely caught if from your husband! Or did I read your post wrong and it was recent whilst you were married?

Answer

Since your husband is military, I recommend going to see your PCM about your outbreak. They'll test you for herpes, and if you have it. They will test your husband.... UNLESS he already had it and they knew that. That would be one way to discover if your husband gave it to you or not. 
If your husband didn't, and hasn't cheated on you, then I would make the assumption that it was the guy who raped you. And I'd explain that to your husband, after making 100% sure that your husband wasn't the one to bring it into the relationship.

Answer

If you read up on herpes you'll know that the virus can stay dormant for years before you ever have a breakout. Me and my husband have it and we both thought each other were cheating. But we both have never cheated. So it came from one of our previous relationships. You never know who you got it from unless you only have sex with 1 person.

Should've called the cops on that guy if it made you feel so bad. Theres medicine for your herpes. You'll be fine. Nothing changes, and your husband should understand if you're the one that brought it in unknowingly.

Keep your head up. It's not the end of the world and life doesn't end. You'll learn to deal with it a lot easier as time goes on.

Answer

mayb hubby cheated

Answer

Communication is the key..you are a victim he did rape you and premeditated his rape as well...As far as your husband he's gonna love you and hurt for you he's gonna want to kill that guy but you're gonna be alright just tell him the entire story

Answer

Please read this information, this shows it has to have been your husband if it was your first outbreak.

What are the signs and symptoms of genital herpes?

Most women with genital herpes do not know they have it. But, if you get symptoms with the first outbreak of genital herpes, they can be severe. Genital herpes also can be severe and long-lasting in people whose immune systems do not work properly, such as women with HIV.

Within a few days of sexual contact with someone who has the herpes virus, sores (small red bumps that may turn into blisters) may show up where the virus entered your body, such as on your mouth or vagina. Some women might confuse mild sores for insect bites or something else. After a few days, sores become crusted and then heal without scarring. Sometimes, a second set of sores appear soon after the first outbreak, and symptoms can happen again.

The first signs of genital herpes usually show up two to 12 days after having sexual contact with someone who has herpes. Symptoms can last from two to four weeks.

This is from a gov women's health site

http://womenshealth.gov/publications/our-publications/fact-sheet/genital-herpes.html

Answer

He best way it to just be honest. Telling him
Partial or none of the story is going to hurt especially since he cld have herpes as well. He has a right to know. Plus given that it was before the two of you he can't really hold that over your head, esp if he had a sexual relationship in the past.

Is he guilty?

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