Big o?

Ok so, I'm on depression meds and sleep meds and I don't know if that's to blame for me not being to orgasm. Actually, I'm not sure if I have. When my bf touches my clit it feels good but then I have to break away like it's too much but almost not in a good way. I can't tell. Also, tmi warning... The closest I get to orgasming is with a powerful shower head on me. I always have to move though when I think I'm getting close. What's up? 
Is it my meds not letting me break through? Or am I actually cumming and not realizing it??? Thanks