Guy code: what is he thinking?
Hey everyone so I don't have girlfriends to talk to about guy stuff so I'd really appreciate any input.
I'm a 24 year old single mom of a beautiful 8 month old little girl. I'm going to try to make this short but I want you to get all the information so hang with me here!
In November (after being separated from my daughters dad for some time) I ran into a guy who was my best friend in high school. In high school it was the whole 'he liked me, I didn't feel the same.' But we had a weird undeniable chemistry and stayed in touch through college. I cut ties with him after he messaged me when I was in a relationship years ago because he confessed his love for me etc. Fast forward to this past November. We started catching up, went out for a drink twice. He initiated getting together. He initiated the flirting. The sexting. Everything. After a night at the bar with him, I found my car had died in the parking lot. He stayed with me until AAA came which took about an hour and a half. He said he wouldn't leave me there alone at 2AM which was nice. We sat in my dead car and talked endlessly waiting for AAA. I got home that night and he texted me saying that he "wants me really bad" and asked if he could come back and see me or if I could come to him. (He lives 2 minutes away). I had my daughter sleeping next to me and obviously my top priority being her, I said I couldn't leave her. About 2 weeks later we had phone sex 😳
Then when my daughters father had her for the night, I asked if he wanted to go out for s bite to eat or a drink. I asked 4 other times and he still said he was busy. I talked to him about it and asked what he wants out of this. He told me he is afraid of commitment due to horrible past relationships and at this point in his life he doesn't feel a girlfriend is good for him right now. He said he needs to work on his insecuritities before he makes that relationship jump. I told him he must have misunderstood and that I'm not asking for commitment. He told me "sex makes things complicated" and that I'm "not like any other girl." He told me "I've done wrong by you so many times...I'm trying to do the right thing this time." I was pissed and said what about the late night talks? The sexting? The flirting? The going out and hanging out? I also saw it from his point of view and told him that I understand the whole "baby daddy" thing might be intimidating and make him uneasy. I explained that I know he doesn't want to get hurt and I don't blame him. I assured him it was over between my daughters father and I. It's now late March almost April and we don't talk much anymore. An occasional 'like' exchange on Facebook of pictures or articles each other has posted but nothing close to how we were months ago.
So what is he thinking? I asked a few guys for their opinions and picked their brain because they are guys and would probably know what this all translates to. They all basically said they think he doesn't want to fall in love especially because he has had a thing for me since we met in high school. It's like an old flame that was lit again. I can't get him out of my head. The chemistry between us has been building for years and I just want a night to be with him. I wonder what it would be like to finally be on that level with him. I'm not looking for a relationship right now. But he came on so strong and determined like he saw me and wanted me and was going to get me. And then it completely turned around. Motherhood and having a kid...my daughter comes first and I'm not as easy to get plans with as I was before I had my girl. And he totally gets that. Is he scared like my other guy friends said? Since separating from my daughters dad, I have been doing nothing but working, going to the gym, and being with my baby girl. But he is the only one who can catch my eye. Everything and everyone else, I have blinders on lol. So obviously this guy is rather important. Anyway, thanks for reading. I tried to put as much info as I possibly can without writing a book. Sorry if it was long. Any advice or comments are very much appreciated!
Comment
Add Comment
Let's Glow!
Achieve your health goals from period to parenting.
