Emotional rant..

I just don't understand why I can't be normal and give my husband a child. I have family and friends who party and don't care about themselves who go and get knocked up.. drug addicts , whores (prostitute) , etc and here I am. Struggling. Dealing with multiple drs appointments.. tests after tests.. this is so hard.. I pray myself to sleep and cry and nothing.. but I can't just give up.. ugh..