Waking up confused
I often wake up confused. I don't know where I am or who I am or what I'm doing. I have to actively think about it. It all feels like I have never been here. I feel so disconnected throughout the day.
I have moved 6 times in the last 2 years ( across Canada) and over 15 times in the last 10 years. Finally, my fiance and I found the place we want to settled down, get married and ttc.
I work self employed as a on call nanny. I'm rarely at the same house everyday and work all different hours everyday every week.
I also use medical marijuana for chronic pain and insomnia. I can't take any pharmaceutical because I get sick. I'm not sure if this effects my morning feel.
I had a stressful abusive childhood. My mom has said that I disconnected during these times. Now I have no contact with anyone that caused my stress and abuse during my childhood. * there were a few people* last time I felt like this I moved over 2000 kms and felt better.
I was feeling happy and full on energy until recently. I am planning my wedding, working crazy hours and going to school. I hate feeling like I'm on auto pilot or I am removed from the situation. I just want to enjoy what I'm doing. I love my job and my school. I have been dying to get married for years.
Does anyone experience this feeling of being disconnected? Any suggestions. Please respond
I am not able to make my changes in my life such as change jobs or moving or stopping using my medical marijuana.
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