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Question

So I'm a 42 year old divorced,mother of 2 boys,20 and 16.I've been single for a long time.I've been out dating a few times and I've come to the conclusion that I'm full of sh"t.Ha ha.I'm a hopeless romantic on the one side,but also a realistic person on the other.I tried dating men my own age,but..oh wow..really!?Guys men my age are just so frustrating!!It's like "we have to settle down quick,we don't have alot of time left to grow old together" and the sex part...uhm..it's hard work.. okay,so I've dated younger guys and the sex part is like awesome and mind blowing,but then I think of the fact that they either have young kids before or in primary school and I've been there,done that OR they still want to have one (or two)..uhm no..I'm at a high risk regarding pregnancy at my age and I've been through it all.I'm crazy about a guy (he is 30) and he is just awesome in every way,but...he doesn't have kids and does want..What am I to do?My boys are awesome,they just tease me about him and they think he is awesome. I try to keep it at friends level,but the spark is definately there..Am I really stupid or just selfish? What's your opinion?

Answer

Definitely not selfish. Maybe you should open up to him and explain that you do like him but you don't want any more kids. I think it's just fair to let him know how you feel. Good luck!

Answer

I'm in a similar situation and I decided to give the relationship a chance. I gotta say that I've never been happier overall in a relationship. It's in no way perfect but truthfully the answer isn't necessarily a man your age or older. My ex husband was 7 years older than me and he's more immature than than my BF who is 20 years younger than me. Each man has to be judged based on his own merits and disposition, not his age. Your kids accepting him is HUGE too. Their opinion matters. I never want to be stuck between my kids and my man. My BF gets along with the kids better than their own father did.

As for sex......girl you're right on the money. Definitely more benefits to having a younger man, especially one that is open to learning and willing to be educated. Having orgasms everyday have been beneficial to my overall sense of peace and well being. He's very good at just making intimate moments for us. He's really very romantic.

Most importantly I FEEL LOVED. If this guy makes you feel sexy, happy, loved, I say go for it. The first 12 months with my guy, I just really couldn't believe it. I'd also ask myself "is this really happening"?  Am I really feeling this strongly towards a 25 year old?  Am I in love or lust?  I was all over the Internet trying to learn about older woman younger man relationships.

My only suggestion is to keep an open mind about having another baby.

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