So annoyed 😡

Had a stupid argument with my boyfriend. And what is most annoying about this is the fact that I'm annoyed and fuming while he's giggling at something on the tv, 5 minutes later. Literally just gleefully said "love you baby!" Out of nowhere. And he isn't doing it to be facetious or rude, he's just over it. And when he figures out that I'm still annoyed, he won't even get why. He'll be confused and hurt and I'll be MORE annoyed that I have to explain it at all. Ugh.

I was reading my "what to expect" book and got to preeclapsya, and read about possible seizures and whatnot. So I read up on it and read about what to do if someone has one. I linked him to the page and asked him to read over it sometimes so he knows what to do since he's the person that's with me most.

He asked why, and I told him what I read. He immediately got weirdly defensive, saying "you're fine" and "don't be negative" which annoyed me. I tried to keep it light though and said I knew I was fine, but this is just in case: if it happens, just roll me on my side if he can and etc etc, went over the basics to which he responded with short, irritable "I knows" and interrupted to say "I know all this." I tried to say I know, I'm just making sure, but he said something like, "okay, stop being negative, it's annoying. According to my beliefs, all the negativity is just asking for-"

Aaaaand now I was really, truly and probably irrationally pissed off. I interrupted said "OKAY." And went back to my book. He tried to keep going and explain his beliefs about drawing negativity by talking about it, but I interrupted and told him to leave me alone. He asked why I was acting like this. I told him if you don't want to listen to me, I won't listen to you. He said that was really childish. I said he started it. He (correctly) said that was even MORE childish and he was just trying to explain. I said if he hadn't started it, there'd be nothing for me to be childish about and to leave me alone. He said I was making if all so much worse for no reason. I told him to leave me alone. He said that he listened to what I said and it was only fair that I listen to him. I said that what he did doesn't count as "listening". He said he read the full article and listened even though he was annoyed, and that I should at least listen. I said I wasn't going to listen to his psycho babble and to leave me alone.

So he did. Put his headphones back in and left me alone for 5 minutes.

And the after giggling and happily watching whatever, he randomly looks up and exclaims, "I love you baby!" He's done it twice.

And it annoys the piss outta me. I know I was just as childish in how I handled it but that my "perparing" is apparently the equivalent to harming my child with "negative energy" pisses me off. That I couldn't even have a basic conversation about it without him spitting up his hippie negativity crap annoys me. I don't feel like I was asking for a lot.

I'm so annoyed because I totally WAS childish. And he was an ass. And he's over it and I'm not. Which makes it worse.

Ok. Just needed to vent.