Another MIL post

Backstory - her husband passed away 4 years ago, and she's refused counseling and has absolutely no hobbies.  She has social anxiety so every time we see her we end up on her couch and she stares at my husband in silence.  For hours.  Seriously.  I've tried to get her into hobbies to take up her free time (her hobbies are news and nascar) but she hates going outside, doesn't like art, knitting, crocheting, cooking fun dishes or music.  It's miserable going over there.  Sometimes she'll make reservation for us at random restaurants and we have to cancel because we have plans/friends etc.  She doesn't think we do anything and both her sons keep on moving farther away because of her negativity and guilting.

So our baby is due early November, and she texted me and my husband separately 

inviting us over for Thanksgiving (yeah - over 2 months away) at 5:23 AM today.  Husband and I have already discussed months ago that baby will be too young for long car traveling, too young to be around 20+ people who I don't want to ask if they've been current with their vaccines, and I know that we will be too tired to socialize.  On top of trying to hide breastfeeding in her tiny house where they are all extremely conservative.  My parents (had 4 kids) both told me that they will come over and bring food for us and say hellos - they agree with us.  

Are we being selfish for staying home for our first Thanksgiving as a family?  (Another day Celebrating thanksgiving is out of the question.  MIL thinks that if its not on the holiday itself then it doesn't matter anymore).  She also never takes in that we rotate seeing eachother's families on the actual day if we can.  We've tried to see her Christmas eve and she was horrified that we couldn't come on actual Christmas every other year.