Whatever happened to drunken mistakes and questionable decisions?

Question

First off..I have recently been struck by a lot of stories and incidents in the news focusing on the idea of consent or lack there of...

I want to be extremely clear...I completely understand that drug or alcohol intoxication hinders, and in some cases obliterates the ability of people to consent to sex. I am not in any way denying that many...many...many woman have been victimized and legitimately assaulted while under the influence.

However, back in my younger days...people got drunk, and people made questionable decisions...who hasn't woken up after a night of partying and said "what the fuck did I do...who are you?" At least I did. My question for the community is, minus extenuating circumstances, does any amount of intoxication nullify the ability to consent? Where do we draw the line between personal responsibility and victimization? Do you feel that in the current social climate that the days of "drunken mistakes" is over?

Answer

Depends...if he's sober and coherent and takes advantage of how intoxicated you are, then that's an issue.

If you are both drunk then it's NOT rape.
Why should you get to ruin a mans life because you woke up and regretted getting drunk and sloppy?

People are way too quick to scream victim these days...and nobody realizes how they are ruining the lives of others by doing that.

Answer

Ehhh I think it depends on the situation/people involved. I've had quite a few drunk one night stands and I don't consider myself ever being raped. But I do know some girls who were taken advantage of sexually while drunk and they consider it rape and I believe them. I don't think it's black and white in those situations but if someone feels like they were taken advantage of then they have the right to feel that way.

Answer

Thank you!!! Absolutely agree with you!!!
If one doesn't take care of herself how does she expect others to do so!?!?!

Answer

I don't understand why this is so difficult for people to understand. I used to date a lot and often times I'd get drunk and slept with my date. Two drunk people hooking is up is not the same as two where one is incapacitated. And yes technically (legally) 2 drunk people can't consent, but there is a distinctive difference. The problem comes with you being coherent in the present moment. I once got so drunk I passed out literally out cold, I woke up to my date on top of me inside me, that's called rape. A drunken mistake as you put it would still involve being coherent and consenting to what's happening. I wasn't allowed to give consent. Even though I would have slept with him had I not passed out because I wanted to, he took that choice away from me when he decided to rape me while unconscious.

Answer

A drunk person can't consent, but I think the actions and circumstances matter. It all depends on how the defense uses the evidence to show that the intoxicated individual either consented through his/her words or actions.

I read a case in Texas where a 17 year old was accused of rape after a drunken night. He had sex with another 17 year old who claimed that she was raped. The intercourse was caught on tape (this was a party with a bunch of teens involved). He wasn't charged with rape because the tape showed that the girl was did not resist nor was she hesitant to participate, thus it seemed like she only regretted having sex with him.

Answer

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Answer

I've had a lot of drunken mistakes. But we were both drunk. More of those moments when you wake up in the morning and are thinking "why the hell did I do that?" But it's better to live life and make mistakes than miss your chance and have regrets

Answer

People always should take accountability for their actions. 
No one should drink till they pass out, but no one deserves rape.

Answer

I don't think drunken mistakes have vanished. They just aren't publicized like rape is, bc they aren't noteworthy.

Answer

Legally you can't consent while under the influence. Call it a mistake or whatever but legally you couldn't consent to things happening

Whatever happened to drunken mistakes and questionable decisions?

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