I'm going to get some 😱

So me and my boyfriend have recently decided to take our relationship to the next level. We've started sexting but haven't done anything sexual in person (wierd I know)- I've had previous partners but never done anything sexual with them either- at age 17 this may seem a little 'unmodern' for some but completley normal for others- trust me I understand but seriously whatever is rifht for you right? :). Anyway- I feel totally ready for this step but I do have a slight feeling of nervousness about he whole thing. Me and my bf are planning to take a few steps this weekend and through our sexting sessions he's revealed that he is planning to 'finger' me and  'eat me out' (apologies for the crudeness) and I have made my own plans to give him a 'HJ' and (maybe) a BJ. I can't wait for it all to happen to experience this but also to take our love to the next level but I just feel like since I'm new to everything I need some advice on what to expect more than anything so I've got a number of questions (quite a lot sorry 😅😂) and I'd really appreciate it if anyone could help me with my concerns. I would like to clarify that we are not going to have sex and this is definitely out of the question. 

-How do we get each other aroused enough to make sure everything goes smoothly? What works for you that we could maybe try? 

-Does fingering for the first time hurt and is there any way to prevent this?  Also is there any after effects I should know about (eg: change in period, spotting, soreness?) 

-As I don't take any birth control I wish for our experiences to be as safe as possible- what should we do with the (Ahem....sorry ) 'cum' once it's in the outside world (I don't really fancy swallowing it lol) -also any tips for safety pregnancy prevention wise (childeren don't appeal to me 😜- also I'm unable to take the pill ur to health reasons) 

-Are there any tips,tricks or techniques to handjobs and blowjobs that would ensure my man can get the good stuff. 

-How do I ensure that I'm relaxed enough to enjoy the experience and not make an absolute fool of myself

Again let me just say I feel completley ready to take this step but I am just a little nervous about how to approach this as I am of course new to all things sexual. I'm not doing this for anyone else but myself and my partner whom I love and trust entireley.