my marriage has gotten dull and boring

Well here it goes..... my husband and I have been married now for 3 years. With that being said he was in the navy and deployed for the 1st 2 years for the most part. Whenever he was home and when we were dating we would have sex a lot and do other things together. Fast forward to this last year, he has gotten out of the navy (blames this on me because I told him I have my dream job and it would be hard for me to leave), he has gained almost 200 pounds and seams content saying coming home saying hi how are ya then disappearing for the night either watching his own show or playing video games. He also blames the navy for giving him severe depression and anxiety mostly angoraphobia. I'm a social butterfly. Then when I finally decide it time to go to bed he wants to kiss and cuddle. We have a sexless marriage, (I'm very sexual so this no sex thing sucks), we have gone to marriage counseling but nothing seams to work. Now he is starting school and working full time 5am-10pm is a typical day. I've talked to some close friends and family about if I'm missing something or if they know of things I should try. I briefly talked to my mom about things going on but am really not sure what to do. I find myself being grossed out by seeing him naked and trying to cuddle/ kiss me (clothes on). We grew up totally different he has only slept with 2 people and he was married to both. Me I have slept with more than my fair share, and he is contantly brining it up. I want a tattoo and have wanted one for a long time it's a huge deal to him I'm not "thinking about his feelings " basically saying my body is his body and that I shouldn't get one because he doesn't want one. He is constantly saying that he is amazed I'm with him and that the door is open if I want to go. Here is my problem and what I'm terrified of. We have quite a lot of pets. 2 horses , 3 dogs 2 cats and a bird. I train horses for a living so am terrified of not being able to support at least my animals and myself if I go thru with getting a divorce. I am so torn about what to do and I'd love some advice. 😢