this kind of relates to, love, sex, and sadness. it's long. sorry.

So to start, I'm very insecure. Every boyfriend I've ever had has cheated on me. Me and my boyfriend now have a daughter together. He has never given me a reason to believe he's cheated, but I have asked a lot. We fight sometimes. I mean, he just doesn't like fighting at all. He's not one to do that.. but we got in a fight yesterday and he went to stay at his friends house last night. Broke my heart. Then he came home from school(he's a senior) then he got his clothes and wen to his friends again and then came home to shower and get ready? So I know you're thinking. Why the fuck did he take clothes and leave then? Because I'm thinking that too. But then he went to work today, got off early, but he's told me every where he's went and what he's been doing, he ignored me yesterday after he told me what he was doing. He says we are over because of this fight we are in, but then why is he still coming back to get clothes, texting me where he is and what's he's going to do and where he's staying? I'm just so hurt and broken right now. I've been home with our daughter all day, cleaning just to get my mind off things, my daughter has cried al lady because she's saw him only when he's came to get clothes and stuff, and he kisses on her and tells her he loves her. I just want some advice I guess. I mean I know him better then anyone. I'm just scared it's really over and it's doing nothing, but eating me on the inside. All my boyfriends went a fucked someone right after we broke up. Like THE DAY or day after our break up, so I'm so scared he's going to get with another girl and I wouldn't even be able to take him back. I'm just really hurt right now.. I just want my boyfriend home. 😞 he's the type of person you have to leave him alone and give him space so he can calm down and get over things. I can't just question and text him 100 times a day or he would stay away longer and go back to completely ignoring me. He said awhile ago if we got in another big fight he's done for good, but me and him are strong as ever... I just don't believe it.. I feel like he will come home.. but I don't know when. I just can't stop crying and feeling sick to my stomach worrying about if he's with someone else or texting someone else. I'm just so parinoid to get screwed over like my past relationships. He's seriously my everything.. he needs to grow up a little bit, but EVRRY guy does in some way. But I really feel like he's my soulmate.. I've known him since I wa skittle and always have had a crush on him, we got together my senior year. I'm just lost. I want to leave him alone so he's like "why isn't she texting me?" I want him to think about me.. 😞❤️💔