October baby became a July baby.

Warning: COULD BE A TRIGGER!

Let me start out by saying that I was a surrogate mother carrying this wonderful baby for a couple that could not conceive for themselves. 

My fiancé and I live in North Dakota and the parents live in Oklahoma. On Jan 31st, 2016 my fiancé and I had our first insem try for the parents. (I used my own egg making Emma my biological daughter and used donor sperm). On Feb 11th, 2016 I had taken a pregnancy test and it was positive. I was ecstatic that it had taken on the first try!! EDD October 22nd, 2016.

The pregnancy was fantastic! No morning sickness, no complications, nothing at all. At 20 weeks, we found out that it was a baby girl. Her name would be Emma-Joy Elizabeth.  Fast forward to July 7th, 2016.. A checkup. My blood pressure was slightly elevated but nothing worrisome yet. My doctor told me to get my blood pressure during the week to just make sure it went back down.. everything was still going great!... Until July 9th, 2016. I woke up with a horrific headache at 6am. Told my fiancé I was going to take a warm bath. It wasn't until I got to the hospital (story to come) that I had realized I had passed out in the bath. After I came to, I decided it was time to go back to bed as the headache died down a bit. We woke up later that morning and I still felt the headache. Around noon that day, it disappeared. Figured it was a small bug.  I

My fiancé went to work that night (5-1am) and I went and hungout with a friend (who was also pregnant, so it was nice). My fiancé got off work and we went home and relaxed for the night.  Once again, on July 10th, 2016 I woke up with a horrific headache. Tried a bath again, passed out, woke up, went back to bed. My fiancé went to work at 9am and at about 930, I couldn't take it ANYMORE! I had been having vision problems, vomiting every 20 minutes and hurting so bad. I had to go in. My fiancé had taken the car to work so I was trying to find a ride as I didn't want to interrupt her at work. I was a nanny for the summer and it was a Sunday so I knew she wasn't at work. I called her and asked if she could bring me to the emergency room. She rushed over with her son and brought me. She asked if I wanted her to wait and I replied "no thanks, I don't know how long this could take. But thank you!" I walked into the emergency room at 25 weeks 1 day. 

I was completely pale when I got into the emergency room and they rushed me up to the OB. I was put in a room for monitoring. I was consistently vomiting still, unable to talk to doctors, couldn't sign papers, nothing. I was started on magnesium immediately. I'm surprised I even remember much of this.  Throughout all of this though, I was messaging my fiancé and making sure I was texting Jenna (the intended mother). She told me to keep her updated.  After about an hour, my doctor came in and said words that no pregnant mothe or surrogate EVER wants to hear... "You have severe preeclampsia, HELLP syndrome, and I don't see you being pregnant through tomorrow morning. We have to get the baby out to save both of your lives. If you would have waited even another 15 minutes, it could have been fatal." I instantly broke down. My fiancé wasn't up there with me yet. I messaged her instantly and told her the news. I then messaged the intended mother (she was at that time in Michigan, getting ready to move back down to Oklahoma, worst timing ever!) 

Again, no words a surrogate wants to ever tell an intended mother.. "Jenna, you need to start making your way here. My doctor does not see me being pregnant even a couple more days, if even by tomorrow morning." The words killed deep down. I can just imagine how it felt to her. This little life I had been carrying for 25 weeks, feeling the kids, flutters... Was coming. And she had so much fight to bring. 

I broke the doctors expectations... Monday and Tuesday went by... I was still pregnant with Emma. I was getting blood drawn every few hours. Blood pressure states every 15 minutes. My fiancé arrived. Best feeling ever. I needed that support.  The morning of July 13th, 2016.. My blood pressure skyrocketed, my oxygen dropped. They threw an oxygen mask on me to help.  That's when my doctor decided it was time. We had to save both Emma and myself. 

I was prepped and wheeled into the OR as I had to have a csection being I was only 25 weeks and Emma was still breech.  It was decided that Jenna would accompany me to see her daughter be born. I got the spinal tap, the anesthesiologist was telling me all the steps that would be happening. I got laid down, my hands were strapped to the sides, and the curtain put up. I couldn't help but be numb. It wasn't supposed to be this way! 😭 Jenna squeezed my hand, I squeezed hers back. Next I hear "test cut." I wait for it.. I feel nothing.  I'm physically numb. I'm emotionally numb. I have tears running down my face. Will I survive this? Will I bleed out? Will Emma be okay? What's the next steps? I can't help but have so many thoughts throughout my mind. I try to listen to the anesthesiologist as he's telling me what meds is giving to me next. Next, we hear it... Emma cried!! A small 1lb 4.5oz baby girl was born at 10:12am on July 13th, 2016. It was a small cry but it was needed. They put Emma straight into a plastic bag.  Everything went blank. I remember nothing after that. The cry was all I needed to be able to let my body take over and do what it needed to do. Not sure if I blacked out. Fell asleep. Or what. But next I remember waking up in recovery. Still no movement in my legs. Not a fun feeling. Constant itching from the meds.  After an hour, I could leave recovery. They wheeled my into the Nicu so I could see Emma. She was so tiny. Tears poured again.  Why did my body have to give out on this little baby?!?! I felt I was to blame.  

I got moved to a bigger "family" room as I would have my fiancé and Jenna with me. My family came to visit (I lived an hour from my family.)  

To this day.. Emma is now 7 months old and almost 4 months corrected.  Jenna and I speak everyday and she sends me pictures often. She's beginning to look alittle more like me and she is so beautiful with gorgeous blue eyes. 😍 

There is so much more I could say in this story, but I will end it here. You may ask questions, as I am very open about this journey.  If you're still reading this, thank you! It is a reliever to me to get this off my chest when I can. Thank you so much for reading!