Throwing baby shower

Sorry if this is lengthy. Not sure what to do. It's been about 9 since my youngest was born (12 since oldest and both are boys). Found out it's a girl this time around. I have a weird feeling my mom won't be throwing me a baby shower since she's made comments that I better start buying stuff now and my friends can be duds at times. I am starting over from scratch as if this is my first baby all over again since it was a big surprise. If no one is throwing me a baby shower someone has mentioned throwing my own. Would this be tacky or ok to do? After voting how would you go about throwing it?