It was suppose to be me. 💔

I just want this to be over. I keep seeing all my friends having babies, and it just breaks my heart even more all my husband does it shrug his shoulders and say we will get there, but thats supposed to be us telling all of our friends and family, its supposed to be us going to doctors appointments and buying all the cute little baby clothes. Its supposed to be me complaining that i feel like a elephant because im 9 months pregnant and just want this baby out. Its supposed to be me sharing pictures of my ultrasounds. Its supposed to be me. He wants to try again as soon as possible but i dont think i am can, i am so afraid it will happen again. My body just absorbed my baby, just like that.. My little baby was gone. I only knew I was pregnant for a few weeks but those were the best weeks i had. I was finally going to be a mom after 2 years of trying. Then it was just ripped away from me. All in about a month. How can i get through this? What did i do wrong? Could i of done something different. I know the answers to these questions but i just cant stop blaming my self. It seems like my husband has moved on from it. Its all i can think about. I was told im not a mom today and it just broke my heart in even more pieces, I was at the store tonight and made the mistake of walking through the baby section. I wanted to just break down right then and there. I know i can get through this. I just dont know how.