why do I keep doing this to myself???

Why do I do this to myself? Why do I do all this symptom spotting and convince myself I'm pregnant? I tested yesterday at 7 dpo. I know it's wayyyy to early but I caved. Got a bfn (obviously). When I looked at it much later, I swear I saw super faint line and was beyond extatic only to have my dreams shattered and accept the fact that it was most likely an evap line. Tested again today but it wasn't fmu and another bfn (surprise, surprise). I see so many women having faint lines around the same time in their cycle and I'm loosing hope 😩😩😩